Blessings

I haven't written anything on here in a bit. So, for the 2 or 3 people who make read this - sorry!

I'm gearing up for Kenya in July! It's pretty amazing to see how things are falling into place. We had our first meeting a little while ago. Originally, our flights were going to cost close to $2,000. Faith, who is leading this trip, was able to get flights for less than $1,300! How amazing is that! God is definitely taking care of us here and it's so encouraging to witness it all. I've even had some people that I wouldn't have expected to donate funds that have asked me if they could help support me financially in this trip. I'm looking forward to how this trip is going to change me. When we met with Daniel a while back, he kept telling us not to come to Kenya expecting to change the country, but rather to expect that Kenya will change us. I'm already seeing it too.

Tonight, I was talking with Mike at bible study and somehow it came up that there is currently a woman in the US from Brazil speaking about her ministry there with the orphans. Mike was describing a little bit about it. I'm actually going to this dinner tomorrow night to hear her speak with one of the other guys at Mike's practice. I'm not sure what this will lead to. I'm keeping an open mind about where I will end up though. I told Mike tonight that it's not really a question of if I will serve outside of the country, it's a question of when and where. I can say that very confidently too.

This leads to the title of this particular blog - BLESSINGS. I was driving a bit tonight and thinking about a lot of things that I have experienced in life, especially before my adoption. I remember a lot of different abuses and living on the streets with my mom and sister. Long story short - it was a pretty dark time. I used to wonder why I had to go through some of it. I've reached a conclusion a while ago that it has to be to help others through it. As I spent some time driving and praying tonight, I thought how blessed I am to have experienced so much! I have experienced what it is to feel so neglected and wonder what it is to have loving parents. I have also gotten to experience the opposite end of the spectrum where I have two amazing parents that love me. I have not just one, but two amazing families that love me and support me in everything I do. It reminds me of Joseph's response to his brothers as they begged for his forgiveness. He told that that what they meant for evil, God meant for good.

I know that what I have been through is nothing compared to what so many children around the world have to endure day in and day out. I think that Mike said it pretty well when he was talking about the kids in Brazil. He said that they face every type of abuse imaginable and death every single day. These are kids who don't know what it is to experience love in any kind. These are the kids that need to know what it is to have the unconditional love of an amazing God.

I feel my calling is to love those who don't know love. I may not know exactly where that will be, but I am trusting in the Lord for a sense of direction and clarity for where to go. I know that it may be difficult to leave my family and friends here in the US, but if that's my calling, how can I say no? I really can't. There is an amazing future ahead for me and I am looking forward to it. I'm still blown away at how God can still use me after how many times I've stumbled and fallen. He has a wonderful plan

Making a difference

To be honest, I'm not really sure why I'm starting this whole blog thing. There are some really cool things going on and I guess this can help me share some of it. I'm not really good at talking about myself, but I don't mind letting others know what's going on; maybe this will help with that.

Let's start with the title of the page: "Making a difference". This has been a goal of mine for a long time. I have a heart that longs to bring smiles to the faces of others. I see so many hurting people out in the world, and I really just to help. Last weekend I got to spend most of Saturday at camp hanging out. I learned two things. The first is that I greatly miss the relationships that I built while I worked there. I spent hours talking and sharing with old friends that I wish I had kept up with more since I left camp and it was a highlight of the weekend. Second, I realized how fulfilled I was while I was there as part of the full time staff. When others would ask if I liked my job, I used to always say, "I work in full time ministry. What's not to like?". I felt a sense of purpose and direction. I miss that too. Last night I found some old CD's with some old STOP the Violence photos on them. I reflected for a while on the different trips that I've been on with STOP. One of my fondest memories is of a girl standing up during a training in Utah and telling us that her school has a problem with gangs. She asked us what she could do about it. Do you know how encouraging it was to hear that! We inspired her! She believed that SHE could make a difference in her school! And you know what? SHE WAS RIGHT! Working with STOP was such an incredible experience. I was making a difference in lives of students who were then going on to impact others.

This kind of leads to the first cool thing - Africa. A couple weeks ago while in church, I started thinking about Kenya. It's one of the countries that my church has adopted. I went home and prayed about it and really feel a strong calling to go. I'm going as a part of a team with my church towards the end of July. There are some really hurting people there who just need someone to love them. Right now, that someone can be me. I know that God is doing amazing things in that country, and He is going to continue to do amazing things in Kenya. But here's the deal: He doesn't want to do it on His own; He wants to use US! I'm always blown away by that! A lot of people have been asking me what we'll be doing in Kenya. Well, I'm not sure. We're not building anything, or providing medical care, or painting a building. We're simply going there to serve. That may mean playing games with the orphans one day and listening to widows the next. The only thing that I know for certain is that we'll be showing the people love. I've been reminded a lot lately of Matthew 20:28: "Just as the Son of Man (Jesus) did not come to be served, but to serve...". You see, Christ didn't come to have everyone serve Him, but rather for Him to serve us. I'm not going to Kenya as a missionary; I'm going as a servant. I'm going to Kenya to serve the people in whatever way that I can.

I'll be in Kenya for two weeks this summer. But, if I'm completely honest, I could see it being longer. It's been on my heart lately to possibly stay overseas and serve. I enjoy my job that I have and I'm very thankful for it. And I am satisfied with my job, I just don't know that I'm fulfilled. This is by no means a definite thing, but it could be. I've always had a heart for underprivileged children; it's a passion of mine. I've always known that I'm supposed to do something with my life that is greater than me. I'm supposed to do something with my life that makes a difference daily.

I guess I'll wrap this up. For those of you reading this that believe in prayer, I ask for you to pray. Pray for the people of Kenya and pray for our team that is going. Pray that as we serve, the people will not see a group of Americans, but rather that they see the love of Christ being poured out upon them.

"And He (Jesus) said to them, 'Go into all the world and preach he gospel to every creature'." - Mark 16:15